Tips for parents who don't live with their children (www.allprodad.com)

• Be supportive of your child's mother/father. Belittling your child's parent does nothing but bring the children into problems between the two of you.
• Choose to look forward to times with your child.
• Use your times together for working, playing, and talking - not just to entertain and buy presents.
• Don't ignore sensitive topics. Children will have questions and fears about why their parents aren't together. Reassure your child that it's okay to talk about it.
• Encourage your child as much as possible. The way you view your child greatly affects how he/she will view himself/herself.

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"We can no longer deny that the absence of a father, not just a male role model, but a father, from a child's life, has a serious and profound effect on that child."
Anne P. Mitchell, Esq.

THE RIGHTS OF CHILDREN

Drawing on our understanding of child development and our experience, we have constructed a list of children's rights,which are the cornerstone of our thinking. Recognizing these rights is the key to healthy and joyful post-divorce relationships with children. (from childrenanddivorce.com)

--A lasting relationship with both parents
--Number one status in their parents' lives
--Parental cooperation throughout the divorce
--Truthful answers to their questions
--Relief from feelings of guilt and blame
--Freedom from interparental hostility
--Attention to their thoughts and feelings
--Input into the visitation schedule
--Privacy in communication with family and friends
--No displacement by competing relationships
--No requirement to parent their parents
--Freedom from the role of messenger
--No coercion to keep secrets
--An understanding of the divorce agreement

Comments on Attention Deficit Disorder (or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) and Vision Therapy by Donald J. Getz, O.D., FCOVD, FAAO

Children with undetected vision problems are sometimes inaccurately diagnosed as having ADD (attention deficit disorder) or ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, attention deficit hyperactive disorder, ADD/ADHD, ADD-ADHD, AD(H)D) or LD/ADD, LD. In the last two decades, the diagnoses of attention deficit disorder or attention deficit hyperactivity disorder have become very popular (some would say epidemic). Before labeling a child as having attention deficit disorder or attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, it would be wise to evaluate them for developmental problems such as problems with visual development, motor development and/or auditory development.

Father Fact :

Children with involved, loving fathers are significantly more likely to do well in school, have healthy self-esteem, exhibit empathy and pro-social behavior, and avoid high-risk behaviors such as drug use, truancy, and criminal activity compared to children who have uninvolved fathers.

Source: Father Facts, National Fatherhood Initiative, 2002.

Children Home Alone And Babysitter Age Guidelines

States do not have regulations or laws about when a child is considered old enough to care for him/herself or to care for other children. States may have guidelines or recommendations. These guidelines are most often distributed through child protective services and are administered at the county level. (more)

1. Ask the court to order that the receiving parent picks up. (Most
parents are motivated to be on time when receiving the child.)

2. If there is a history or concern of violence, exchange at a neutral
public location such as a park. (Always bring someone with you as a
witness.)

3. Consider asking the court to order that either parent has the "first
right of refusal" when the other parent cannot watch the child for an
extended period during their custodial time. (This gives you the option
to be with your child before other alternatives are considered for
extended childcare.)

4. If your court ordered visitation is being denied by the other parent,
consider asking that the police meet you at the next exchange time to
"keep the peace" because of concerns of potential domestic violence.
Bring a certified copy of your court order with you that defines your
visitation time. If the child is not made available, ask the police to
write a report documenting the situation. These reports are very
helpful in proving contempt or obtaining custody modifications.

           
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